Introduction
Today we are messing around with goats, two goats to be accurate. Yes, we are reviewing Goat Simulator 2, which is strangely enough called, Goat Simulator 3. Don’t think too hard about it, or your brain might be invaded by goats. Yes, goats in your brain, this game, and this review is all about fucking around. Despite that, we are going to look if this game has some serious moments and if you should play, shall we enter the simulation?
What did I think before playing Goat Simulator 3?
I was skeptic about playing this game, I did not like Goat Simulator 1 at all. It had many problems and issues, so many that I refunded it. However, this game was on Gamepass and I heard a lot of praise and that the developers fixed countless problems, next to that, it is a co-op game. What is better than to fuck up town as a goat, with your wife, goat wife? Wife goat? No matter, we are going to check the Steam page for the best information!
The Steam page
https://store.steampowered.com/app/850190/Goat_Simulator_3/
The Steam page is insanely fun to read, oh my god, it seems we are in for the fucking ride of a lifetime, with goats, so many goats! There is a small open world to explore, quests to complete, insane things to do, it is time for one of the best laughs we have had in a while, I truly hope this is true. My wife was like, nah, this can’t be fun, I set out to prove her wrong, it is fun to be a goat!
Rating
I rated Goat Simulator 3 with an 8.4 before playing.
Despite Goat Simulator 1 being a bust, this seemed to a very big improvement to the previous game.
Story
This is going to blow your mind, but this game has an actual story that makes more sense than some of the games that promise the best story ever. You are a goat, and you were captured by a farmer, of course, you escape and build a castle inside a small tower. But can you ever truly escape the farmer, or is this all fake? Maybe this is all, just, a simulation? There is only one way to find out, fuck up the world to upgrade your castle and find the truth.
Rating
I rate the story of Goat Simulator 3 with an 8.8
This story surprised me, it all seemed to be random until at the end, everything comes together with a big serious twist that leaves you scratching the back of your head while thinking, what the fuck just happened.
Gameplay
Now, the masterpiece you have been waiting for, the gameplay. Yes, it is couch co-op, and you can be a goat, a shark, a fish, whatever you want! Be you! There are many ways to customize your character. Most of the items also give you perks. To upgrade your castle, you will need to complete events and quests. These are hilarious and sometimes difficult to understand. There is even a portal to a fake Ikea. With a guy named, Sven. Of course, my wife licked the character… Yes, goats can lick people, abduct them and more.
Just like in other open world games, there are multiple areas, all with secrets to unlock, achievements to, well, achieve. Quests and events to find. For example, helping someone move, or summon a fucking tornado. Imagine trying to help the guy to move by dragging the boxes into the garage when your wife summons a tornado and all the boxes fly away.
This whole game is hilarious, it is just, insanity. There are many Easter eggs, and real Easter eggs to find. Every quest you achieve will help you build your castle. This is important to the story, you will have to complete all the quests on the map to complete the story. This entire game can be played in co-op mode, including the whole story mode, which just adds to the hilarity.
Most of the events are random and non are alike. This game all seems nice and easy, until you find your true enemy that is lurking deep inside the void. There are many fun things you can do as a goat, like stealing cars, abducting ghosts, finding Bigfoot, and licking hippies.
Rating
I rated the gameplay of Goat Simulator 3 with a 9.4
While the open world map is not very huge, it does add a challenge to complete the whole game, my wife and I laughed ourselves silly with this game. We even became the president, yes the president is a goat now.
Sound and Graphics
Graphics
Oh my god, the graphics are insanely good, and hilarious. The ragdolls are great, I love seeing the people flying around like crazy people. You can also throw away cars, jump from buildings, and many more. All the areas also look different from each other, from a farm to the big city. The couch co-op split screen also works amazingly.
Sound
I was sold by the voice casting immediately from the start. The intro is a clear reference to Skyrim, which made me laugh very hard. The screaming goats are great, the people complaining about the goats, there is just so much variety in everything, along with the soundtracks. Even god makes an appearance and punishes you if you steal the fruit from the mighty tree.
Rating
I rated the sound and graphics of Goat Simulator 3 with a 9.3
A wonderful experience for couch co-op!
What did I think after playing Goat Simulator 3?
While I did not enjoy Goat Simulator 1, I loved this game. It was a fun and small, open world to fuck up. I think I might have driven over a few people. One of the most shocking moments for me was when we freed Billy and brought him to the sea. My wife and I were glad we had rescued him. Three seconds later, he got murdered by one big giant fucking fish!
The castle is a fun addition and you can even decorate it. One of the fun things is that when you complete events, these items appear in various situations in your castle. Like Sven, he is in our castle! There is even a switch that makes the entire game have a filter. Like, I had never expected that. If you enjoy couch co-op games, this is a must play!
SPOILER ALERT!!!
The video below contains the ending.
Rating
I rated Goat Simulator 3 with a 9.3 after playing.
If you are up for one hell of a ride, and one amazing couch co-op game, then this is the game you are looking for!
What are my personal thoughts about Goat Simulator 3?
While I was skeptic at first, it soon turned to joy and laughter. This game does not take itself serious, until it does and everything falls into place, all of it, the insanity, the ragdolls, the crazy creatures. All of it becomes clear at the end.
Rating
My personal Rating of Goat Simulator 3 is a 9.9
Beeeeeh!
Last Words
Pros
- Goats that can do about anything, including licking people.
- A small yet fun open world that offers quality above quantity
- A lot of fun customs that all have their own perks
- There are many quests to complete, even secret ones that include, the one ring
- The soundtracks are amazing, along with the great ambiance
- A fun castle to decorate to your style
- Great co-op gameplay
- Un unexpected great story with a huge plot twist
Cons
Goat Simulator 3 delivers as promised, a fun adventure with goats that love to ragdoll shit around. My wife and I had an outstanding time with this game.
The Final Rating
9
Please let me know what you think of Goat Simulator 3 in the comments!
I hope you enjoyed reading this review, I hope to see you in the next review!
If you liked reading this review, maybe you would like to share this review with your friends.
No negative comments hmm 🙂
Nope, GOATS!
It’s amazing how a random simulator brings people so much joy, lol. Two issues I have with simulators are: #1 it gets repetitive once everything is tried out; #2 it’s endless.
If it has a good ending like this one, I am happy.
It makes you wonder how you can come up with these kinds of ideas for a game. Surprising 🙂
looks like fun
I played the first one and had some fun. I hope the second (third?) One will be even more chaotic! Seems you had fun with it. 🙂
It is more chaotic!
Don’t play this unless you completed Goat Simulator 2, or the story won’t make any sense! 🙂
Don’t forget about Goat Simulator 2.6!
Almost 10 out 10
Fun game
Good review! This is a fun game!
Looks like really very fun title, especially when playing in 2 (coop). Going from 1 to 3, maybe they wanted to highlight an improvement game has made 😉
There is an unspoken rule that sequels suck and are not as good as the original. They literally tried to avoid this curse by skipping the second game.
Perfect for playing with friends.
Every Time I see Goat Simulator I have to think about our honeymoon. There was a goat which didn’t chew on a ribbon from our backpack 😀
Still have to play this…
Funniest part? The ragdolls ^^
I played Goat Simulator 1 with my cousin, and we kept laughing all night. It’s a really funny game, but like you said, it had its’ problems, had many many bugs, that’s why I’m too excited to try Goat Simulator 3 with my cousin to laugh again and see the improvements. Thanks for the review!
I am glad you liked the review!
Here I was thinking: Goat Simulator 3? Was there a second game I missed? Turns out the jokes started early in the game title… XD
Yep, that is the whole joke, and it was a fun game!